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The only mistake made was getting married.
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Marriage is hard ...
- Thread starter Frogskins
- Start date
Frogskins
I am Jim Jannard...
Very valid point
key words being "both parties."
When it's always one person's fault and never the other's,
time to walk ...
(at least if I end up single again, you and I can hang out even more and have fun hunting down exclusive pairs of Frogskins all over Chi Town ...)
Just to make you smile.
kronin323
Font of Useless Knowledge
Translation--------We gonna go get SOME BOOTAY Frogskins
I am Jim Jannard...
I'll post more into this when I have finished my work day. I just recently went through this process and I am having a very hard time with it. I was married for 6 years and together for 10. One day she came home and said I'm moving out. I believe that a lot of this stems from people not trying any more. We are a throw away society now and that's what I feel happened. Marriage is not 50/50. It is 100/100. If your not going to give your all and be committed then you need to rethink what is going on. I'll post more in depth with my opinions on the matter but when you are apart take time to reflect on how you are treated and how you treat her.Ddigi7alph0enix
Guest
@Frogskins obviously every situation is unique and no one knows better than the parties involved. Having said that let me share a short narrative with you.
I divorced several years ago from my "high school sweet heart". Our son was 2 at the time. Until the night we sat down and both spoke honestly about everything that had built up over the past 5+ years, I believed that I could do anything so long as I had the will to do it. I learned that night just how wrong I'd been all those years. I was literally miserable for more than half the time we were married. There were maturity issues on both sides, but I was never able to look past my frustration with her over the simplest of things.
I had a major emotional breakdown that night when I finally stopped holding back all the anger, frustration, and even hatred towards her or the things she had been doing. It was a big turning point in my life where I realized that putting myself through misery wasn't a viable solution to hold things together, and that as strong as I felt I was I had reached my breaking point. It took the better part of a couple years for that feeling of failure to subside, and the feeling that I couldn't do what I needed to keep my marriage together for my son.
That said, it took that traumatic series of events leading to the divorce to teach me lessons that I should've learned years earlier. That marriage is an equal partnership at all times, and that ignoring or putting off addressing problems is the worst thing you can do. It's so easy to get stuck with your blinders on, unmovable in your opinion that you are right and they are wrong.
Whatever the outcome is I would encourage you to think on it heavily before making a decision. Reach out to friends or family that have gone through similar experiences. Don't ask them to pick a side of who's right and who's wrong, just ask them about their situation and reflect on any parallels it may have to your own relationship. Sometimes it just can't work, like it was for me. Often times people just stop caring if it works. What category your case falls into is for you and your spouse to decide.
If you would've killed her when you wanted to you'd be out by now.Similar threads
